Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Questions UnConscious People Never Think To Ask

Leviticus 18:22 states homosexuality an abomination . . .

I have questions though . . .

When burning a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them.
Q: Should I smite them?

I want to sell my daughter into slavery (Exodus 21:7).
Q: What is a fair price for her?

I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24) Q: How to find out? I try asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 says I may possess slaves, if purchased from neighboring nations. A friend claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians.
Q: Why can't I own Canadians?

My neighbor works on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 states he should be put to death.
Q: Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

Eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev.11:10) . A friend feels it is a lesser abomination that homosexuality.
Q: Are there "degrees" of abomination?

Lev. 21:20  states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I wear glasses. My wife wears contacts. 
Q: Is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed including around their temples. This is forbidden (Lev.19:27)
Q: How should they die?

Lev. 11:6-8  states that touching the skin of a dead pig makes you unclean.
Q: Can my son play football if he wears gloves? (Made from cow skin of course)

My uncle farms and violates (Lev.19:19) by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). They also curse and blaspheme a lot.
Two Questions:
Is it necessary to get the whole town together to stone them? (Lev. 24:10-16) 
Can't we burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev.20:14)

Borrowed (with editing) from a circulating email regarding a statement made by Dr. Laura Schlesinger a radio talk show host, an observant Orthodox Jew, and the open letter response penned by a US resident James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia