Mmmmm, when we're 64

This past December  our family took a Tripcation: (Trip: with kids, Vacation: just Gail & I). 
Anyway, the weather was PERFECT (low 80's).

Perhaps it's because I'm older, perhaps it's because I knew Chicago winter weather was just around the corner, but gained an appreciation for the phrase "retire somewhere warm".  I get it. 

Along with thoughts of future retirement (long far forward future) I received this bit of humor today.

Thought it worth sharing . . . 

When we came out of the shop, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. 
We went up to him and I said, 'Come on, man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?'
He ignored us and continued writing the ticket.
I called him an “asshole”. 
He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn-out tires.
So Gail called him a “shit head”.  
He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.
Then he started writing more tickets.  
This went on for about 20 minutes.  The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Just then our bus arrived, and we got on it and went home. ;)

Gonna

My uncle passed away the other day. I believe that it was by the grace of God that he did. Almost four months ago he had been diagnosed with a horrid type of brain cancer - glioblastoma multiforme (GBM), a stage 4 aggressive primary brain cancer.

From living life and in good health one week to depending on a wheel chair and watching the world slowly and irrevocable ebb way. It seems that he either had a heart attack or a pulmonary embolism. Either way he departed while still living at home, falling asleep each night and waking up each morning to his wife.  So much better than what the future held . . .

Gail and I are fortunate. We were able to take time off work and drove to their home (a few hundred miles away) to have dinner with my uncle and his wife. It was a good visit. It was a visit that we termed as "Putting On Our Big Boy & Girl Pants".  We knew for sure we wouldn't see again.

It was great to see him, visit, share some stories.

We learned family fun facts and lore. For example, I had no idea that the legal first name of my mother is completely different than what I thought.  Perhaps slightly more surprising is that my Uncle and Mom have the same first name - how it is spelled differentiates the female / male. Who gives their kids the same name? Evidently my maternal grandparents! Who knew?

It was so very sad to watch him and his wife interact. To realize that soon their marriage of almost 40 years would end. Not for lack of love, or faith, or due to the stress of raising a family. But due to something so totally not in control - cancer. Certainly not what they planned.

My uncle's passing reminded me of another Uncle (not brothers) that passed about a decade ago. A few years after his passing we saw his wife at a family holiday gathering. We asked her how things were going. She looked us in the eye and said, "You know, we were gonna." She continued that as they raised their kids they put things off. (purchase of "nicer" things, travel, vacations, etc). They would say to each other that someday "they would gonna". Just as my uncle was about to retire he was diagnosed with a form of lung cancer. He was gone within a few weeks.

What my Uncles taught me: "Gonna" will likely never arrive. And cancer really sucks. Cancer doesn't care who you are, who loves you, how good a job you did, what your income is, what great kids you raised, or that there are a bunch of grandchildren that would benefit from you being around. And it certainly doesn't care how much you love your spouse or how long you've been married.

As all this is going through my mind a friend sent a picture - it's of my son and two of his buds from several years ago.

Mike, AJ & Jullian - 2006

The "boys" were hanging out together yesterday so we had them poise in the same order. 

Mike, AJ & Jullian - 2012

Comparing the pics was a "wow" moment. Time passes. I'm glad we are raising our kids and living our lives with plenty of "done that" rather than "gonna".

I'd rather sign off saying "been there, done that" than wishing about the incomplete gonna's.

Will Romney Learn From McCain Epic Failure VP Choice

As a result of spring cleaning I found an old soapbox in the garage, I'm wondering if it works . . . 

The other night I watched HBO's Game Change. It's a documentary about the McCain selection of Sarah Palin, and how she fared during the campaign. Steve Schmidt, McCain’s senior political adviser, and other top campaign operatives were primary sources for the film and they have attested to it's accuracy.


That Palin comes off as a nitwit is no surprise. What shocked me is that the Republican party did nothing. My concern - what is the responsibility of "The Parties" (Republican AND Democratic) to find the best possible potential leaders? And we citizens - we must take responsibility. When we vote in panderers, idiots, narcissists, and incompetence to leadership we get exactly what we deserve.


Illinois, my home state, has an uncanny ability to elect real winners into office. We are the only state in the nation to have two former governors, Democrat Rod Blagojevich and Republican George Ryan, are both serving time in "Club Fed" for crimes they committed while in elected office.  Perhaps the Illinois electorate should have our right to vote taken away. Clearly we are not smart enough to use it appropriately.


Today MSNBC ran a story about Governor Romney and as he begins the process of vetting a VP to run with him that the ghost (perhaps poltergeist) of Palin looms over the process. Perhaps the GOP learned from the McCain failed experiment. Hopefully the GOP gained an understanding of the need to give to Americans the post possible choice as someone to vote for. That pandering and serving a select group will not bring success for the nation.  


As former White House chief of staff John Sununu (and former governor of NH) said "In the end, there is only one imperative: don't blow it."


Indeed. America needs competent leadership. 

Life Is A Roller-coaster

This is one of those weeks that exemplifies life. Events and activities that are filled with trepidation and fun. Some tremendous good news, some sorrowful news, and some news that makes you appreciate all that you have and hold dear. All happening in the wrap speed of what we consider normal today; a speed that can cause a range of emotions just like a roller-coaster. Exhilaration one moment, gut wrenching angst the next.

Monday started off with a business trip to Vegas. Now you have to understand . . . I LOVE Vegas. It's not that I'm a gambler. I'm not. It's not that I spend big bucks and go to the $175 a seat Cirque shows. I don't. What I love about Vegas is the pulse. There is always something going on. Something to look at. Something to do. It is Disney World for adults. All the fun. None of the whining.  By the way, one of the best places to go to in Vegas is Red Rock Canyon - Nevada's first National Conservation Area.

I had two shows to cover. Tuesday morning I went to the first one - it's part of an industry that often makes me reluctant to shake hands with some of the people I meet. They have sleazy business ethics. 1/2 of what they are saying is false, the other half is a lie. I guess it was fitting that the show was held in the Mirage resort. There are some great companies to do business with. But like an oasis in a dessert, they are few and far between to find. Luckily I had to spend only a few hours at this show.

Tuesday I woke up to two text messages; one from my brother saying he had news to share. The other from my wife - our young nephew had a seizure that caused him for a short time to lose speech. By the time I called my wife she said he didn't have to stay overnight in the hospital and seemed fine. Her sister, an excellent doctor, was scheduling tests, etc. to find out what is going on. We finished the call by my sharing that my brother had sent a text too. I'd let her know what is going on with him.

About an hour later my brother sent another text - he had proposed to his long-term (6 years) girlfriend and she accepted! I sent a heartfelt congratulatory text back and told him we'd connect when I returned to Chicago. A few moments later I saw this shirt in a local store and laughed.



Wednesday morning my wife called. Our nephew had another seizure. He was being admitted to the hospital and hooked up to monitors so the doctors can get a handle on what's going on.

And she had more news. My mom had called. My uncle had just been diagnosed with glioblastoma multiforme (GBM) which is a stage 4 aggressive primary brain cancer.  With chemotherapy and radiation the prognosis is 12 - 15 months.

Wednesday also was the start of the other show I went to Vegas for . . . the Creative Painting annual show at the Tropicana Hotel.  It was 11 years since the last decorative painting show I attended. I wondered who would remember me (a lot!), who I would remember (more!), and how the business changed (tremendously!). It was great to see artists (Doxie Keller, Judy Diephouse, Lynne Deptula, Prudy Vannier, Debby Forshey, Donna Dewberry, Jillybean & Mary Owens) and companies, (All American Crafts, DecoArt, MartinF/ Weber) I came to know well in the late 80's and 90's. It was good to see new companies and artists such as Stampendous (love their new take on stamps and painting) and really enjoyed taking a photo of Joyce Ortner as she painted a 8' x 5' canvas.  It was also fun to take a video of Janice Miller as she gold leafed a fingernail. I bought my 16 year old daughter some gold leaf so she can do her nails.


Thursday came with the sobering thought that dear friends were taking their teen son to the hospital to have some substantial surgery that while taking care of a significant health issue, it will also alter his life. The good news came late in the afternoon that they surgery was a success and their son is recovering nicely.

So I flew home Thursday evening and got in the door about 11. It felt so good to give my wife a hug and kiss. She asked if I had a good time. I immediately responded with "no". My quick response surprised both of us. Not even the fun and energy of Vegas could overcome the emotions brought on by the roller-coaster of life.

Where Did 19 Years Go?

Last night we drove up to visit our "old neighbors".  About 19 years ago we moved in across the street from Kathy & Joe.  At the time they had 2 boys - roughly 3rd & 5th grade. Our kids were still figments of  imagination.

Watching Joe & Kathy raise their boys was the best parenting instruction Gail and I could have asked for. We learned patience, perseverance, the value of sticking to your guns, and how a well timed glass of wine or beer (for the parent!) is an appropriate remedy.

Lucky for us Joe is a paramedic. More than a few times we called Joe over to "take a look at this" in regards for a bloody finger (no stitches), a banged head (stitches), etc.  Kathy was "911 nextdoor" for Gail to call on with the anxiety of being a new mom.  Our kids grew up calling their boys "NeeNee" and "Big Jon" - both of them are 6' plus!

So many years ago we shared countless evenings sitting over bonfires, sharing stories, and developing a friendship that is deep and meaningful.  Not to say the years have been paved with rainbows and stress free living. Both families have survived some big stresses -  like most families do. It gave me pause last night when we realized that NeeNee is the same age as I was when we moved in. Literally - where did the time go?!

Today, our kids are now 15 & 17, their "boys" are 28 & 30.  Both are married, NeeNee to his high-school sweetheart, and Big Jon to a fine young lady from Idaho, and they both are proud parents! That makes Joe & Kathy loving grandparents of two boys, and both daughter-in-laws are expecting again.  NeeNee will welcome another son into their lives, and Big Jon will bring - for the first time in a generation - a new baby girl to the family.  2012 is looking to be a great year!

Last  night was a blessing in many ways. 

Hearing our kids call out "NeeNee" and "Big Jon".

We shared laughs, updates on our lives, got to know Big Jon's wife a little better, and recounted old stories.

Joe gave our son some great insight into a possible college / career path.

We'll survive these teenage years. I just hope the end result is what Joe & Kathy have. What an evening!